Change

I didn't want to drink that day, but I took no action to insure against it - Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book (Page 517)

I had never read these words before last night. I almost didn't attend the meeting last night, weather, child care, etc. But I did and as always, I got hit between the eyes with what I needed to hear. There are so many days when I'm not hungry, I'm not emotional and yet I still find myself back into my disease. Because if I feel okay, then I don't need to DO anything, right? Just ride the wave! If I ride the wave, I drown. Every time.

Change is inevitable, but so much about my disease does not change. Accepting change and accepting what doesn't change (and the wisdom to know the difference!!!) is my goal today. Serenity Prayer is my lifeline today. May be something else tomorrow, but for today, this is what I'm holding onto.